ex-boyfriends

i wish i could date only girls without ex-boyfriends. i know, i know, that sounds terribly selfish of me, but i have my reasons.

pros of girls without ex-boyfriends:
-they can't lie about it just being a short crush
-they can't continue to write romantic emails to him once you've started dating
-they can't wear a ring thats from him while saying its just from a relative
-they can't keep pictures of him on the wall while saying its just pics of old friends
-they can't spend a summer telling you they love you while still wanting to be with him
-they can't plan a trip to visit him instead of visiting you
-they can't claim that the purpose of the trip was to introduce their new friends to their old ones
-they can't be angry at you for feeling a bit concerned about the planned trip
-they can't avoid saying i love you to you when he is sitting in the car with them
-they can't break their promises and get drunk with him
-they can't have sex with him multiple times
-they can't hide the fact that they had sex with him for 4 months
-they can't lie to your face when you ask them one and only time if they kept their promises to you on their trip
-they can't try to break up with you just so they don't have to tell you about having sex with him
-they can't try to ruin the relationship by making it purely physical to avoid actual emotions
-they can't lie about having given the ring back to him
-they can't partially confess to having sex with him by saying they just cuddled a bit since he was depressed
-they can't partially confess to having sex with him by saying that he tried kiss them but they stopped it
-they can't completely test your faith and belief in repentance by telling you about having sex with him and claiming to want to change and be better
-they can't leave you behind a bunch of belongings when moving home, including the ring they lied about giving back hidden in a box they meant to take with them
-they can't tell you you don't love them and you have never loved them even after you tried your hardest to forgive them for all of the above things but decided it was best to start dating other people
-they can't ask for the ring back a few months later
-they can't destroy your ability to feel for the next three years

seems like a pretty compelling set of pros to me. sadly such a desire is unrealistic.

nostalgia (not office supplies related)

my amazon gift card balance has been going down quite quickly lately. in addition to stuffed animal versions of love songs, i have been buying a lot of cds. mostly just filling in long time gaps in my music collections, albums i've been saying i need to buy for years. hopefully by next week i will have the entire pre-1998 discography of they might be giants. so. many. memories. i guess its hard for there not to be since they were basically the only band i listened to from age 10 to 14. laughing hysterically at tiny toons clips, finally discovering the album with the song particle man upstairs in that old house on 7th avenue, singing to myself in the back of the minivan, making mixtapes during the random utah roadtrip, requesting songs at church dances and being the only people dancing.. and finally going into freshman year having lost my only good friend. i spent the summer playing starcraft during the day and at night running exactly twelve laps around the high school track in order to get my 100 miles in over the summer just to get my tie dye hot miles club tshirt.. why in the world did i trade that away? anyway.. first week of cross country practice, we were sitting on the stage waiting for coach to show up and i was humming dr. worm to myself. one of the seniors sitting near me overheard and asked me if i liked they might be giants. i said i did and he thought that was really cool. that led to me being befriended by all the older guys on the team, and most of my good friendships from high school can be directly traced to that day and humming that song. so.. eclectic alternative music nostalgia?

dear dragonlady

i have decided i will make an exception for you.

congrats to you two btw. wish i could make it out...

its about time

its been two years. i am ready again.

refresh

sorry for the emo blog last night. i feel a lot better now, i just needed to work something out of my system. weight lifting tonight felt really good. the only downside was hell's kitchen was playing on one of the tvs so i had to keep looking away or i would ruin it for myself...

friday: intern #2, my work mentor, and my work mentor's friend went out on the town... it was different. not exactly my scene to be honest. i think bar hopping is one of those things you kind of have to do a bit drunk, and well, since i dont planning on getting drunk any time soon, sad times. but we played some pool and had some pretty good food at about 1:30 am, so it was still a pretty decent night all in all. no groping incidents like last time i went to a club.

saturday: for some reason g and i had decided to go down to san fran at 6 am. seeing as it was around 3 am before i got into bed from the night before, it ended up being 7, but i was still freaking tired almost all day. we stopped by the davis farmer's market. side story: my great grandma's health is starting to go, and her nurse has told her and the family to start making final preparations. it is kind of sad, but she is in high spirits and is not in any pain. she loves being visited by all of her family, so i thought i better get down there. i picked up a bouquet of flowers (g picked them out) to bring to her. and i got a yummy sticky bun and some unpasteurized apple juice (the good kind). anyway, then we headed down to concord, only to find out great gram had gone to get her hair done. so i just dropped off the flowers and we went in to the city. first we hit up the exploritorium since g wanted to go to the tactile dome, but it was all sold out. then we went down to japan town, checked out the stationary store and the grocery store, and ate some crepes (ah, harajuku memories..). after that, we wandered down to hayes valley. g searched in vain for a pair of shoes and i picked up some more shaving cream from nancy boy. i've yet to try it out. it has a lavender flavor in contrast to the cucumber flavor of the one i already have. it should be excellent. then we had planned to have a BBQ with molecularbond and co, but since we had missed great gram earlier in the day, we needed to head back. after a long search for a restroom, we grabbed a sandwich from a really yummy deli in concord. the last time i had a sandwich there i could barely open my mouth, so this time it was much more enjoyable. the deli had these signs up about tomatoes being expensive so one needed to ask for them if they wanted them on their sandwich. i didn't really get the purpose of the sign, because if i ordered a sandwich that usually comes with tomatoes, isn't that implying that yes, i do want tomatoes? whatever. moving on, after a nice rest and back rub in the park, we hit up great grams. she was very happy to see us and she loved the flowers. the rest of the family was doing puzzles in the other room as usual. g seemed to like them, which is a good thing. great gram asked me if i was coming to mother's day dinner on sunday, and since that was impossible to say no to, i promised i would come. the drive home was killer. dead tired the entire way, barely kept away by g. she saved our lives. once in sac, we grabbed a milkshake, which i thought had rejuvenated me, but when we went over to g's friend's house, i faded quickly. but they had an amazing down. it came up to about my waist (i am 6'3" for the uninformed reader), so i loved it. totally a man sized dog. after that was sleep.

sunday: thankfully elder's quorum presidency meeting was delayed till 11 am. dunno if i should be saying this yet, but we are kind of a lame duck presidency now since the president has now moved away. its been a good run though. i felt like we have given some good service. g and friend came and sat with me during sacrament meeting, so that was a nice change. after sunday school (only one class to go!), i hopped in the car back for another trip to concord. i was so sick of driving. but i made it. it was good, though a bit awkward at times. i am not as close to my extended family as i should be. my aunt and my grandpa got in an argument about great gram's burial plans, so yeah, different. but we finished a puzzle, and great gram was just glowing from all the visitors. she was watching some tv show, and she asked me if i enjoyed it, and i told her i didn't have a tv. so then she called in my great aunt and told her to give me her old bedroom tv. she was very happy to see me take it. got to see molecularbod too, so that was fun. made it home late, dead tired of driving.

it was a busy weekend, but good. got to spend a lot of time with family and with g, so i was happy.

sorry

i was really pumped to blog a bunch tonight, but i sort of lost the desire. funny how quickly things can change like that. suffice to say, it was a crazy weekend for a number of reasons. sadly its ending on a lower note than expected.

an evening

i'm on a blogging roll, just try to stop me.

i went out to tower cafe with g tonight. i liked what i got, though to be honest, i have no idea what it was that i ate. it just tasted good. it was fun, and the company was quite pleasant.

after eating, we debated about different options of things to do: imax movie (but the movie she wanted to see wasn't playing), iron man (she cancelled that one right off the bat), go-karts (again, cancelled). out of ideas, we decided to have an "adventure." this involved driving around and discovering the sacramento marina. keep in mind sacramento is land locked with no bodies of water nearby, so it was just like a parking lot pond for yachts. but there were like 4 skunks just wandering around. debate continues as to whether they were baby skunks or not, since its hard to judge from a distance.

then g's friend called and said she wanted to have a movie night. she asked us if we wanted to get the snacks or the movie, so i said snacks, and then she said no, she wanted to get the snacks. i asked why she even asked. then she told us which movie to get: "p.s., i love you". again, why ask??? mind you, i remember seeing the preview for this film and vowing to myself that i would never let such dribble pollute my brain. so much for declaring such vows.

so we (g, friend, friend's male interest, and i) all congregated at my apartment to start the movie. it was awkward. i am not going to attempt to get into the details of the entire convoluted situation, but lets just say things are complicated between friend and friend's male interest. apparently he decided he didn't want to cuddle or hold hands with friend, which made kind of weird for all (especially g/me who were trying to cuddle and hold hands). and then suddenly half way through the movie he stood up and said he wanted to leave. ok? on top of all this, as predicted the movie was dribble. not funny, and full of people with terrible looking teeth. when they left we decided to turn it off.

well, the good times didn't end there. g and i thought (or at least i thought) we could make the best of the evening and just hang out, chill, cuddle, etc etc on the couch for a bit. seemed like a good idea, until randomly my roommate started yelling a conversation to me from his room. i haven't really blogged about my roommate yet, and for this, i am most sorry dear reader. volumes might be filled. he is a good guy with great intentions. but he is unique. his door had been open, he knew we were out there together having "alone time" since he must have heard us talking. and so he decided to ask me about where he should transfer to finish his undergrad. g just gave me a look as he went over the pros and cons of stanford and university of wisconsin. long story short, there goes the mood, time to take g home.

it was just one of those evenings.